To see if your hands are doing the necessary job, it is better to watch what happens at first, rather than trying to “feel” if you are doing it right. So, how might this be accomplished? To put it very simply you need to watch the ears.
 
The ears of the horse will tell you if you are putting too much pressure on either side of the horse when you are asking it to accomplish anything. The ears need to remain level — for it is the proper use, by the horse, of the area of the poll that determines if the ears stay even. If the ears tip either way too much and the ears get out of balance you are most likely over-flexing the neck and not allowing the horse to properly use their poll.
 
When this happens, the ears become out of alignment and the horse starts to tip their nose to the side, rather than having it level and balanced. Once this rider error is started and left uncorrected it sets in motion the movement that is referred to as a “walking through the bit” to occur. This could then lead to a horse that bails out and cannot be trusted since they feel that they are not trusted.